Dealing with the Unknown

Advent is an interesting time in the church year. As a child I enjoyed it because it meant the church would be filled with blue and silver and Christmas trees. There would be bright lights and that cool Advent wreath. We talked about Jesus' coming a lot--which as a child I connected with Jesus coming as a child in Bethlehem. But, as I grew up, I found that Advent was a bit more somber as we focused on the second coming of Christ. It sure is something to ponder. The Bible displays God in the second coming as someone who will judge. As Americans, this is not the most comfortable idea. We do not like being judged for anything--even if it's right or wrong! But I would like to look past the judgement seat to what lies beyond it: heaven; and, what makes heaven so noteworthy during Advent?
I felt like I should post some sort of response to the shooting in Connecticut. After mulling around the idea for a while, I found that plenty of people had already responded. Therefore, as I was rolling around in bed this morning, my mind saw the shooting in the context of Advent. 
The question is quite simple and complicated all at the same time. How do we react when stuff like this happens? It can either be something huge, or something more close to home. It can be war, or it can be a feud between neighbors that goes too far. It can be plane crashing into buildings, or it can be a "prank" call from a radio station to the wrong person. What do we say? What would you say to the person who had a child die in the school shooting? What would you say to the person who just lost their job? To the family members of someone who committed suicide? To someone whose parent was diagnosed with a slow and deadly disease? To someone living in Syria or in war-torn Africa? To someone living in China, Japan, or North Korea as the tensions rise? What on earth do we say? 
Well, despite our efforts to put God into our little defined boxes, it's not possible to define him. There are pages and pages we could fill of all the questions we have for him. We can try to put human explanations on the bad things and claim that God only works in the good times, but that removes him from his seat as God, does it not? The fact of the matter is that we don't know.  We don't know the grand picture. We don't know why we have a God that chooses to work through pain sometimes (if you don't think he does, look at the cross). We really don't have all the answers. But, we have some. We have what God revealed to us through Jesus. Which, leads us back to Advent. The world was never promised to be easy. The road was never promised to be short and sweet. There's nowhere in the Bible that says, "Make heaven happen on earth! It's possible if you work at it!" No, but it does say, "Come to me all you who are wear and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest" (Matt. 11:28). We can only find peace in the promise of God for our eternal salvation. And, eternity is where heaven is. That's the place that's perfect. That is our true home. Revelation so clearly lays it out: "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away" (21:4). So if you've ever wondered why the prayer in Advent is, "Come, Lord Jesus..." this is why. The pain is terrible, and we don't know why. But we look forward to our promised salvation with Jesus forever. 

Personal Assessments and Sinful Nature

I have not made a post in quite a while, and I actually feel quite bad about it. However, the last few weeks have been very fast-paced and filled with work and school. I do hope to have a few posts this week to give you something to read!

Since coming to the seminary, I've noticed quite a push towards personal assessment tests. These would be tests like the Meyers-Briggs, etc. So far, I've taken two of these assessments since coming to campus. It's quite interesting having to take a test to evaluate who you are as a human being. You answer questions about what you would do in certain situations, your likes, your dislikes, etc. Somehow, the people that score these tests always come up with a description that sounds at least a little bit like you.

A friend and I were reflecting over these tests on Monday while we were driving to fieldwork. We were reflecting that the personality assessments can make note of two lifestyles: one without Christ, and one in Christ. Now, the tests are secular and don't come right out and say that, but nonetheless, the characters they portray most of the time will fall into one of these two categories.

When I've taken these exams, I've noticed that one quality that keeps coming out is my ability to persuade. Now, persuasion can be both a very positive and a very negative tool. It can be used to help people realize your point of view (Paul does this in the book of Acts quite a bit), but it can also be used for selfish purposes. We may try to pull away from the sinfulness of our nature, but we can never quite do it.

It reminds me of the first "Homeward Bound" movie. There's a part in the movie where one of the dogs falls into a pit. The dog tries a few times to climb up the side of the pit, but it's muddy and he slides back down. Now of course every movie ends up having a happy ending, so somehow, the dog gets out of the pit and back to its original owner. But this is how we are in sin. We're like a weak dog stuck in the bottom of a muddy pit. On our own, we can never get out. Thankfully, Jesus came as the Perfect Sacrifice so that we could be saved. That doesn't mean that we don't fall into the hole again (quite regularly actually), but we are continually rescued--redeemed--by Christ.

We all have special personalities. Certainly not everyone at the seminary is persuasive. Some are reserved, some our very social, etc. But we all have a natural addiction to sin. We're born with it. Thankfully, Christ saves and allows us to use our talents for his good, and not our own selfish ambitions.

October General Newsletter

Below is a copy of the general newsletter that I send to supporting churches. It contains general information about my daily life at the seminary. While I will try to cover daily life issues in some of my blog posts, I will also use some of the blog space to do some deeper theological thinking. For those of you that want the updates, this is for you!

Greetings!

This is the initial newsletter in what should be a monthly cycle (at least while classes are in session). Numerous people have told me that they would enjoy reading about the life of a seminary student, so I felt eager to come up with some sort of letter. I hope my writings give you at least a glance into the life of a seminarian.

Compared to other advanced degrees, the Master of Divinity degree is quite different. While there is a great amount of intensive study, there is also a chance for ministerial formation. This formation process is quite helpful four years from now when many of us (first-year students) will be placed into our first congregations. One does not simply become a pastor by studying the Bible and significant theological writings. They also need to learn how to build relationships, preach, lead, teach, etc. Some of these things simply cannot be learned in the classroom. Therefore, students must be out in their communities, working with parishioners, and spending time in new cultural situations (these are just a few examples). While this first newsletter will be fairly general, following letters will have deeper explanations of the formation process.

Cassie and I have never lived anywhere near the state of Missouri. The city of St. Louis is quite vibrant. However, it is facing some serious problems with crime and poverty. The seminary is located in a suburb of St. Louis, but just a few minutes from downtown. We live on campus in condo units created for married students. The condos are off to the side of the actual classroom buildings, so I am able to feel like I am “going home” after a day in classes.

Classes

I have a fairly busy first semester ahead of me. Currently I am taking Hebrew and Greek readings, Pastoral Ministry, Introduction to Historical Theology, and a class on Lutheran doctrine. My professors are very kind and encouraging. However, they do feel free to challenge the students to dig deep into their work to get the very most out of the class. While I do like my classes, I will admit that I will be thankful when I am done with both Hebrew and Greek!

Field Work

Every seminary student is involved in field work. This is time set aside to work in a congregation in the St. Louis area. While I have not taken the classes that allow me to preach or lead worship, there are still many things I can do. I have been placed at Ascension Lutheran, an LCMS congregation five miles from the seminary campus. Since I have only been at the congregation a few weeks, I am still building relationships with the members. Currently, I am working with a few other seminary students in a Nepalese Bible study. Over the last three years, people from Nepal have moved into the neighborhood of Ascension. The Nepalese primarily practice Hinduism. However, there is a group of about twenty people that have converted to Christianity. They have been baptized, and some are already taking communion. Only some of the Nepalese know English. For this reason, the Bible studies are in a bi-lingual format. Usually, the teenagers are translating for the adults. While I am still new to the church, it is such a joy to be sharing in the ministry of Ascension Lutheran.

MissionShift

As part of my first-year field work, I am taking part in a new course called MissionShift. On Monday nights, we meet in a large group a church near downtown St. Louis. The course is not strictly reserved for seminary students. There are many lay leaders and pastors from other congregations in the St. Louis area attending the class. The focus of MissionShift is on the changing cultures in our American cities. With the change, there are now many cultures and ethnicities living near each other. The church is called to reach these people. One of the most effective ways to reach people with the Gospel is by building relationships. MissionShift is designed to teach us how to build these relationships across cultures. So far, we have focused on racism and poverty in St. Louis and different cultural norms that can effect communication.

Cassie’s Life

Cassie is quite busy as well. She is finishing up her bachelor’s degree in Family Life Education with an online cohort. Recently, she has been highly recommended for the master’s program. Therefore, the application and interview process for the program will begin soon. Cassie also works full time at a Lutheran school in northern St. Louis. She aids in the teaching of K-3^rd grade students. The school is ethnically diverse, and Cassie has enjoyed working with a different culture. There are many new things to learn about family systems, and the way their children are raised. The school reaches out to many students stuck in less fortunate living situations. The school is also struggling financially. The teachers and administrative staff are working very hard to make sure the school stays open so that the ministry can continue.

Prayer

I do want to note how important it is to have people praying for us while we are in St. Louis. Many times, we think that churches and seminaries are “safe places” away from the evil of Satan and the world. However, it actually can be quite the opposite. Satan is continuously trying to thwart the growth and spread of the Gospel. Because of this, spiritual warefare can be seen on campus in the every day lives of students. So I eagerly ask you to pray for spiritual protection for the students and staff on campus—that they remain safe, healthy, and focused on Christ. Please also pray that students can keep up with their studies and family lives. Many students have children as well. This can be another struggle to balance family time and work time. If you wish, here are some other things that it would be wonderful to have you praying about:

·       For the city of St. Louis—the crime rate is high, poverty is high, and unemployment is high

·       For Cassie as she balances work and school

·       For Ascension Lutheran Church in St. Louis—that they may continue to touch the lives of the Nepalese. Pray that God would raise up Christian leaders among the people of Nepal.

·       Almost all seminary students struggle with finances at the seminary. Pray that God would continue to raise up people willing to financially support the seminarians.

“For the Lord is good;

his steadfast love endures forever,

and his faithfulness to all generations.

                                                                                                   -Psalm 100:5

Learning who is in control...

For the last two weeks (and probably a little bit longer than that), I have been pondering how to begin this blog. It also has not helped that it seems like there's not enough information to post when classes are not in session, but then once classes start, there's never enough time to post. Finally today, two weeks in to the start of classes at Concordia Theological Seminary in Saint Louis, Missouri (or 20% of the way through the academic semester for those who like math), I am beginning my first blog post. So, if it fails, know that I just spent numerous hours in classes with a 10 minute break for lunch and just took a break from 3 1/2 hours of reading. (I hope you can pick up on my sarcasm)  :) 

When I was first entering college as a music major, I was intrigued with the very essence of practicing music. I spent hours and hours and hours...and hours rehearsing for Luther College's annual "Christmas at Luther" program. All those hours of rehearsing paid off rather quickly in the numerous performances. I could have performed that set 20,000 times and still received chills when certain chords or words were sung. It was an "awe" experience. It is certainly one of the things I enjoy the most about performing music and composing it. When the chords and the lyrics mesh up just right, it would be odd for a human being not to have a near "out-of-body experience." However, as I earlier mentioned, achieving this musical "Garden of Eden Moment" takes nothing short of long hours of rehearsal and a miracle! 

My reasoning for my long introduction to music has to do with a new "feeling" here at the seminary. I'm still not sure how I would describe it. It is a moment when your heart leaps up to your throat and you feel so excited and so at peace and so joyful that you don't know what to do. In my mind, this beats the musical experience by a long shot. Why? God is directly connected with it. 

My first few weeks at seminary have been the exact OPPOSITE of a cake walk. There has been more craziness in schedules, in finances, and in life in general than I have ever experienced in my life. But I am excited. In my classes and in my devotional time (both private and with others), it has become greatly apparent how much significance can be placed in the fact that God is in control. He is the Creator. He was there before any other existence, and he is GOD! It is much easier to go through life living in that simple knowledge. When God becomes God, there is a realization that there is simply nothing that we have power over as sinful creatures. There is also nothing that we have power to do to make us better, but we can rest in the hands of God. The only God, and the one who is in charge of it all--working as he wills. 

The word's of the prophet Isaiah have been with me all this week:

Have you not known? Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
  the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He does not faint or grow weary;
  his understanding is unsearchable,
  and to him who has no might he increases strength.
Even youths shall faint and be weary,
  and young men shall fall exhausted;
but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
  they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.                   - Isaiah 40:28-31

With those words, I note that I received an email in my inbox today. I pulled up the email from my home church back in Colorado and my pastor had signed the email the way he always has, with the words: God is good! 

God is truly in charge and even though it may not always seem like it to us, his way is truly good. 

I cannot thank everyone enough who has been praying for my wife and I, and also those who have been financially helping support us in the cost of seminary. God's blessings!